Is Your Child Overscheduled and Overstressed?
New film explores 'America's achievement culture' in education: join the conversation
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“There is a dark side to America’s achievement culture,” says filmmaker Vicki Abeles, and her film, The Race to Nowhere, is at the forefront of a movement geared on mobilizing families, educators and policy makers to challenge the educational status quo in America.
The film takes an insider look at the stories of overscheduled young people, burned out teachers and well-intended, over-involved parents that are engaged in what Abeles calls, “The Race to Nowhere,” the destination of youth lost in an educational model that is more focused on outcomes that individual student learning.
AP/Honors students are focused on acquiring high GPA’s, an arm’s length of activities and awards so that they will look good on their college application. But, what are they missing in the total experience of high school if they are being pushed hard and fast through this system that doesn’t acknowledge their interests or abilities?
If you think that this epidemic only affects High School students, you are wrong. Case in point, the little league parent that pushes their kid so hard he cried when he didn’t catch the ball, and the coaches weren’t any better in teaching the boys to cheat so that they would win. Every parent is hoping for a scholarship and preparation starts earlier and earlier, robbing even elementary level students of their childhood experiences.
A troubling film, “The Race to Nowhere” seems to leave almost every child left behind from teaching the test to preparing kids not for college, but the college application. Who cares about critical thinking, autonomy or compassion; our kids need to get into good schools, get on the team, stop riding the bench, excel, succeed, win! Really?
Is your child part of the epidemic where anything goes to succeed, make honor roll and star on the football team? The levels of stress, depression and burnout fail to prepare children as bright, healthy and engaged individuals within the work force.
Abeles, actually claims that the opposite is true and our children are turning into disengaged, apathetic perfectionists who can’t meet their own expectations, let alone their parents, turning to prescription drugs and other recreational debauchery to let off steam. Is this the worst case scenario or par for the course?
You can view clips or check for specific dates, times and venues of showings at www.racetonowhere.com.
Maybe you would like say a few words on the subject, no dissertations necessary. Are your children over scheduled, over burdened and over stressed with their education, extra-curricular activities and organization involvements? Are you pushing them or are they pushing themselves? Is it a service or a handicap to their future?
Silagh White
8:54 am on Thursday, February 24, 2011
As a product of being over-scheduled as a child, I try to recognize the trend in my parenting. I was grateful for the "Chinese-Mom" conversation last month, because it started a healthy debate in our home. My husband and I are trained musicians. We know that learning music informs the PROCESS of thinking, which transfers to all manners of problem solving. There have been times they've wanted to quit, but we haven't let them yet. Because discipline is learned by seeing through goals. When the complaining starts, it's up to us to try to make the learning fun. They don't get to quit school when it gets boring either.
Sticking with the music lessons has meant that they can't sign up for baseball. The key reason for this is that childhood activities seem so much more extreme in time commitments than when we were children. Why does Little League need to meet five days a week?
Our 7 year old B/G twins have a reasonable (I think) weekly routine. Music lessons on Monday. Scouts on Tuesday. Swimming on Wednesday. Ballet (just for girl time) on Saturday. Thursday and Friday afternoons are clear for them. They come to afternoon meetings with me and are very cooperative, because they have learned that this is how it is. We hope that through our example of work ethic, they will understand responsibility not entitlement.
Truth be told - I'm still trying to unlearn being over-scheduled myself!
Tara Zrinski
5:27 pm on Thursday, February 24, 2011
Your story will resonate with a lot of readers and I sympathize with the little league schedule. I often wondered why little league met 5 times a week. The games didn't get much better and often were not fun for the kids because parents/coaches were more interested in winning than having fun.
I wonder when kids get a night to just relax or if they even know how to relax. When my kids have a night off from activities, we still look for something to do but try to choose more quiet activities-- board games, sketching, chess, etc.
Thanks for chiming in and sharing your experience.
Tara:)
Jodi Ireland
9:21 pm on Thursday, February 24, 2011
As the parent of an almost 14-month-old, and high school teacher who sees many kids suffering from burn-out, I do worry about "overscheduling." I don't think I ever used the expression "Stressed out" when I was in school (at least, not until college!). When I was growing up, I had dance lessons on Thursdays, art class at Baum on Saturdays, and piano lessons (with dad) once a week. Otherwise, my parents let me explore different interests. I remember computer classes, an introduction to taxidermy class, acting classes and swimming and diving lessons. I never remember feeling over-pressured or over-worked or over-scheduled. And to me, all of these activities were fun and interesting.
While some might say that I'm an "ADD" adult because I never focused long enough on any one thing to get really "good" - I don't know as that was ever the aim. I do know that now, at 40, I'm interested in everything from archaeology to zoology and still take time to learn about things outside my professional life. My students often ask me "How do you know that?" And I just tell them, well, I'm a lifelong learner. So I'm really hoping that we can instill that enthusiasm and interest in the world around him in our son, too.
Which is not to say that I might not nudge him towards our favorite sport, baseball. But 5 days a week for little league? Seriously? Wow! Maybe I'll introduce him to my old standbye, Taekwondo!
Tara Zrinski
10:37 pm on Friday, February 25, 2011
In today's fast paced culture, I think that some of the stress comes from having to be the best or do the best. While some might be exploring, those who are participating to be the best put a different kind of pressure on themselves. Stress comes from the competitiveness that has characterized everything from tap dancing to baseball. It has become unacceptable not to be the best even though there can be only one who is the best. For many kids, the stress comes from parents and peers goading them to try harder or do better at all cost. That pressure can translate into a lot of different negative behaviors.